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Breastfeeding vs. Male Entitlement

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So just recently, a friend of mine had an experience that made me upset (and her more so). She was told by a relative, who had not said anything prior to this, that breastfeeding in "public" (in this case, at his home) was not ok. Could she please be more discreet and do it in another room?

This troubles me on several levels. These are not listed in any particular order.

First of all, satisfying the male.
Second, removing the act from view, and non-normalization
Third, isolating the mother.
Fourth, ignoring the child's needs.
Fifth, making their protest age-dependent.

First: Satisfying the male. Breastfeeding, by its very nature, is something only a woman can do. There might be isolated medical cases you can cite to the contrary, but under normal conditions, only a woman can do it. I believe that it is this reason, similar to menstruation, female orgasm, and masturbation, --- in other words, things that might be uncomfortable for a late 19th century male to think about…

In the Right Place, At the Right Time

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...Or, Why I Take Pookie With Me To Public Places There are many reasons I take Pookie with me, the primary one being that I feel like I need a little one to hold, and/or the comfort of a stuffed toy. I'll sometimes take him just for company, but usually it's because I'm going somewhere that I expect to be confronted with topics that make me emotional or will at least bring sensitive topics to mind. And sometimes I just take him because it might be fun, or because I want Charlie represented.

The other night, however, we saw first-hand another reason, one that is actually just as important, and that I hadn't thought of. My husband and I were at a lecture by a vibrant pastor/theologian (Nadia Bolz-Weber, if you are interested), and while the point of the talk was not related to any usual triggers, I thought I might be better off if I had someone to hold, just in case.

(Click here for a link to a great podcast interview with Nadia Bolz-Weber)

As we came in, we saw the peo…

October

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Friends,

October means a lot to many of those in the baby loss community, whether or not any personally significant dates for that family occur in this month.
October is infant loss awareness month, with the 15th being "remembrance day". So, there are more events, ceremonies, walks, etc. in October than most months. In fact, many hospitals host remembrance ceremonies where they read out names.
Did you know that about 1 of every 4 pregnancies will not result in a living child? And that about 1 of every 25 pregnancies will end in stillbirth?* That's a lot of affected families.
In fact, I'd like to invite you to participate in the "wave of light". At 7pm, in your own time zones, at your own locations, light a candle, or two or three, for babies that have died. Keep the candle lit for an hour. That way a wave of candle light will encircle the globe, remembering so many little ones who are loved and missed.
I know many families affected by this type of tragedy.…

Museum of the Alphabet

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On Monday, September 18th, my husband and I had the opportunity to visit The Museum of the Alphabet, outside of Charlotte, NC. In fact, we knew nothing about it before we got there, having found it by chance when looking for interesting museums to visit while we were in the area. The museum is run by and associated with JAARS, ILS, and the Wycliffe Bible Institute. Essentially, the organization wants to be able to provide Christian Bibles to all peoples, and to do so, they sometimes have to help create alphabets and writing systems for languages that have heretofore been purely oral. The museum appears to have been created to help educate the public about that last aspect of their work. Aside from a few instances where the museum leans biblical-literalist, the exhibits are fantastic and do a wonderful job of explaining how various cultures and individuals through the ages have invented or adapted ways of putting language into a written system. I had the impression that some of the st…

Poem: Sadness isn't Catching

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