tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85037287223716912642024-03-18T23:55:14.417-04:00Being Charlie's Mama<center><br>In Memoriam of our Stillborn Son Charlie<br>
A medley of reminiscences, resources, adventures, and fiber arts.<br><br>
<b>Please comment on what you see!</b><br>
I would love to hear what you think.<br>
You can also find us on Facebook and Instagram. </center>Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.comBlogger269125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-24545204329857274322021-03-04T21:28:00.001-05:002021-03-04T21:28:07.408-05:00NEW WEBSITE!!!Hi Friends,As you may have noticed, it's been quiet on here lately. Well, guess what! I have a new site set up with my own website name, and all of the archived posts are there, but there's a new post there for you to check out - www.stillbirthfriend.comI'll be focusing a little bit more directly on helping you be a great support and communicator with your friends who have had a baby die, so if Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-1418352042444047292020-06-20T16:06:00.001-04:002020-06-22T18:06:30.634-04:00Happy birthday, my sweet oneHappy birthday, my sweet one. Now you are 4 years old. My friend Caitilin says for that makes you a proper preschooler! You would be so big now. You're a big brother now. I imagine you so often, blond like your mommy and daddy were at this age. I imagine you being mischievousness when I'm rocking your brother to sleep, imagine you being so sweet and so loved.You are loved and missed, my sweet Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-14551720032626758322020-06-18T12:53:00.003-04:002020-07-02T09:57:49.327-04:00Big News(Topic: Pregnancy, rainbow baby)
Hi Friends,
As you may have noticed, there have been some large gaps between posts lately. I am about a year late in telling you this... I was expecting and now have a rainbow baby!
Please note, this post will talk about pregnancy and having a small baby, after having had a loss. If you are in a place where reading about someone's pregnancy and babySarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-88001113362733178032020-01-18T04:00:00.000-05:002020-01-18T04:00:07.604-05:00Sunflower Hat and Blanket(Topic: Knitting, NICU donations)
Hi Friends!
This is a project I made at some point in the last three years, while I was in a knitting group that made blankets and hats for babies in the local NICU. I knitted quite a few, and I don't think I've posted this one before! This is one I had fun inventing, particularly the hat.
The hat with petals! It has a crocheted border. This is before Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-64309149044015108332020-01-11T04:00:00.000-05:002020-01-11T04:00:09.807-05:00White and Blue Handtowel(Topic: Knitting)
Hi Friends!
This is a project I finished a while ago, but am finally getting around to sharing. This is the partner to the Blue and White Handtowel I told you about last May.
It's the exact same pattern, with my exact same yarns and color choices: just reversed! This is so I have a matching but alternating pair of towels for the kitchen.
This was a really soft, silky cotton Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-27501862554913725702020-01-08T04:00:00.000-05:002020-01-08T04:00:04.452-05:00All About Charlie(topic: grief, memories, babies)
Hi friends,
It has lately become more and more noticeable to me that when I talk about Charlie, it's usually in certain repetitive scenarios and often the same few facts and stories.
The most common scenario is that I end up chatting with a stranger, or new acquaintance of some sort, and they ask if I have kids or my former pregnancy otherwise comes up in some Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-41561561961018184292020-01-01T04:00:00.000-05:002020-01-01T04:00:02.761-05:00New Years Resolutions(Topic: Life after loss, grief, holidays)
Hi Friends,
I'm terrible at New Years Resolutions, and anyway, resolutions work better when you come to them bit by bit and work on them piece by piece.
But for fun, and for reflection, here are a few things that I'm currently working on:
1) Be patient with myself, and let my feelings be what they are.
I often "should" on myself - which means that I Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-54349964306581491452019-12-29T18:43:00.002-05:002019-12-29T18:43:09.263-05:00Fingerless Mitts(Topic: knitting, Christmas gifts)
Hi Friends!
For Christmas this year, I decided to knit one present - a daring act, since I often procrastinate or take on too much, and end up with nothing done! But I picked a smallish project that ended up going faster than anticipated, so my Dad got a finished gift for Christmas!
One of his jobs is being a translator from home, which involves a lot of Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-29873563690213252882019-12-26T17:30:00.000-05:002019-12-26T17:30:12.647-05:00Support and How I Changed(Topic: grief after loss support, holidays)
Our mantle, stockings, and present area - no tree this year.
Hi Friends,
This year is different. This is our 4th Christmas after Charlie died, and every year has been different, but this year is really different.
For the last 3 years, my reaction to Christmas has been what you see in support articles: a combo of needing to be involved, but not Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-10901207034617468452019-12-21T15:31:00.000-05:002019-12-21T15:31:17.575-05:00Pan Handle Potholder(Topic: Crochet, sewing, cooking)
Hi Friends!
Recently we noticed that our cast iron pans with bare handles (as opposed to wooden handles) are easier to pick up when we have a dedicated potholder shaped like the handle rather than just wrapping one around it.
I figured, that would be something easy to make! So I crocheted one, using cotton yarn:
Crocheted exactly to the specs of our pan Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-35042682703113934302019-12-18T04:00:00.000-05:002019-12-18T04:00:09.038-05:00Words About Death - Part II(Topic: Words, Death, Reactions, Triggers)
Hi Friends,
A few weeks ago, I posted about 15 words related to death that I either liked or disliked, and shared my reasons why I find some to be better than others.
I don't often have a lot of people comment on my posts, here or on Facebook or instagram (where I share the links) but I often do have a few people reach out and chat with me about what Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-2600945814082328402019-12-11T04:00:00.000-05:002019-12-11T04:00:03.989-05:00Why Can't I Write?(Topic: Effects of grief, reading/writing)
To the teachers who told me I was a good writer:
Was I really? I was an avid writer. I loved words, and playing with their sounds and cadences. But was I a good writer, really? I wrote so much in college, but it was rhythm and sound without soul, empty. I look back at the poetry now, so many pages of it, and so much of it is hollow. Did I write Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-11492054696398473442019-12-07T22:23:00.001-05:002019-12-07T22:23:26.780-05:00Pookie Visits Euclid Beach Park(Topic: Beach, adventures, teddy bear)
Hi Friends!
This week we happened to be visiting Cleveland, Ohio, and at one point I was in Euclid with a couple hours to kill. Pookie and I looked at google maps and picked out a likely looking park!
Pookie on a swing. I wasn't rocking him, the wind was!! The video below gives you some sense of how strong the wind was...
Looking "out to sea". Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-90777086688402911332019-12-04T04:00:00.000-05:002019-12-04T04:00:01.434-05:00How I'll Think About Christmas This Year(Topic: Grief, Religion, Christmas, Pregnancy)
Hi Friends,
Christmas, and particularly the figure of Mary, can be a bit complicated to come to terms with after experiencing infant loss. I've written about this before, exploring how the themes of pregnancy and happy arrival can be very difficult for a loss parent. I've felt sad, during the Christmas season, and I've felt bitter, and I've felt Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-56172296068832241112019-12-01T20:30:00.003-05:002019-12-01T20:30:36.781-05:00Thanksgiving with Pookie(Topic: Thanksgiving, Holidays, Weighted Bear/Pookie)
Hi Friends!
Many loss parents struggle with Thanksgiving - it's a holiday with a lot of family coming together, and not all families are completely understanding and supportive.
My husband and I are lucky. Our families are both really supportive overall, and my family's Thanksgiving traditions are pretty laid back and don't involve a lot ofSarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-90690233985945558582019-11-27T04:00:00.000-05:002019-11-27T04:00:06.560-05:00Five Resources for Remembering Your Child at the Holidays(Topic: Holiday traditions, memorials)
Hi Friends,
At first I thought I'd write about our personal traditions (which I will still include at the end!) but I realized there are so many good resources out there that I wanted to share. In this post you will find 5 great resources with their own lists of ideas on how to honor and remember your baby during this upcoming holiday season. Most are fromSarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-44738454407065792892019-11-23T04:00:00.000-05:002019-11-23T04:00:11.037-05:00Completed Folia Cowl (the "leafy cowl") post number 4(Topic: Knitting)
Hi Friends!
Gosh, this one took forever. I'll check the dates on my first photos in a minute to get a ballpark of how long this took, but I'm thinking it was close to a year from start to finish.
... yep, I started it in late October 2018...
The reason this took so long was not that I'm a slow knitter, but that this project got put in timeout several times for being Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-28538512842482212422019-11-20T04:00:00.000-05:002019-11-20T04:00:05.454-05:0015 Words About Death and Infant Loss(Topic: Words about death, opinions about effects of words)
Hi Friends,
One of the things I notice as the mom of a baby who died is that people sure use a lot of words about death that aren't dead! Some of these words are fine, but some are possibly problematic for some people. Many of the words below are fairly generic, and a few are infant loss specific. The opinions are my own, but also Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-58668290933147145262019-11-06T04:30:00.000-05:002019-11-15T18:59:06.750-05:00My Family Is Perfectly Imperfect Too: A Book Review(Topic: Book, Children's Book, siblings, talking about loss)
Book:Perfectly Imperfect FamilyBy Amie Lands
Just to be frank and up-front, I got a free advance e-copy of this book in order to be able to review, but my health prevented me from reviewing the book before it was released. The advance copy was not given with any financial incentive or any particular slant I had to write about (ifSarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-76329615909812017222019-11-02T04:30:00.000-04:002019-11-02T04:30:03.241-04:00Pink Lacy Cowl - from Cast On to Bind Off!(Topic: Knitting)
Hi Friends!
This project was a quick one between others, with a pattern that I could easily memorize and let my fingers work on while I watched tv or listened to music. At one point I listened to one of my sisters play in a concert via a livestream, and knit on this project the whole time! The pattern was simple and repetitive, so it was easy to automate.
The original Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-6921388356762089822019-10-30T04:30:00.000-04:002019-10-30T04:30:06.327-04:00What's the Reason? A Book Review(Topic: book, illness, grief, what to say)
Image credit: Kate Bowler's Website
Book:Everything Happens For A Reason: And Other Lies I’ve Loved
By Kate Bowler
This is probably not a book I would have picked up on my own.
Lately, I read mostly fiction, if I read. I don't read nearly as much as I used to - picking out a book that's "safe" (not heavy emotion, and no pregnancy or infant Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-214914774862427522019-10-15T21:26:00.001-04:002019-10-15T21:34:58.703-04:00October 15th, Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness/Remembrance Day and Wave of Light(Topic: Pregnancy and Infant Loss, remembrance, grief)
Dear Friends,
Once a year, when October rolls around, the story that is a constant part of my life gets talked about a bit more, and noticed by more people who haven't been through it. This is because October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month - it was declared to be so by Ronald Reagan in 1988. October 15th got established as Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-2073291303929456552019-07-31T04:00:00.000-04:002019-07-31T04:00:06.524-04:00Cardboard Chic - House Tour(Topic: Moving)
Hi Friends,
Currently, my living room aesthetic is "cardboard chic" - available at your local packing supplies dealer!
Yep, still working on unpacking from the move I mentioned several weeks ago. As I'm sure you've noticed, I've been fairly quiet on here. Several reasons: One, I didn't want to give exact dates of the move, because while I know most of my readers, I don't know Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-74041703542172549502019-07-20T04:00:00.000-04:002019-07-20T04:00:02.651-04:00Pookie in Dayton and Yellow Springs(Topic: Travel with Pookie)
Hi Friends!
Last fall, when hubby was doing a lot of interviews and I went along, Pookie and I got to spend a day exploring the Dayton area, and ended up exploring Yellow Springs. You get to enjoy pictures of Pookie playing at a local park we found!
Pookie being my copilot
At the park! Pookie is in his comfy tiger suit which is good for travel and playing!
Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8503728722371691264.post-77924343278849783602019-06-15T04:00:00.000-04:002019-06-15T04:00:02.557-04:00Father's Day Is Hard For Us
(Topic: Grief, dealing with grief, triggers, pictures, loss, stillbirth, pregnancy and infant loss)
Hi Friends,
Charlie was born on Father's Day.
This weekend is so, so hard for us, every year.
It's odd, how my mind works. It doesn't know what date Thursday was that year, or Friday, or Saturday - I only remember the date of Sunday because it was his birthday. But I remember what happened Sarah, Charlie's Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15048124125414035241noreply@blogger.com0